The Lunatic You're Looking For
by tajuki
Summary: Indira Sinistra: quiet Astronomy teacher with a sad past. Sirius Black was the love of her life until one Haloween left her alone, Lilly and James dead and Sirius imprisoned. Will their past save him or does she believe her peers that wish to condemn him?


Disclaimer:  All characters and scenes that I've used for this song fic belong to J.K. Rowling, namely Sirius Black and all scenes involving _Prisoner of Azkaban. Indira Sinistra is the literary property of soupofthedaysara. 'You May Be Right' is the musical genius of…you've guessed it…Billy Joel. _

Author's Note: This, my second attempt at song fiction, is drawn from scenes of _Prisoner of Azkaban. I know, I know. I always use Billy Joel songs, but I can't help it. They're so animated and suited perfectly for the task. Anyhoo! This one takes place on Halloween night, Chapter Eight __The Flight of the Fat Lady. You all know how it goes, so I will end my explanation there. And now on with '__The Lunatic You're Looking For'._

***

                Indira cut out on the feast. Since the escape of Sirius Black, she hadn't been much in the mood to celebrate. She wasn't anxious to see him apprehended as most of the wizarding world had been at that moment—she might be one of the tragic few that actually wanted him set free. That is, she was convinced of his innocence. 

                She was in the middle of marking Miss Granger's essay for Astronomy when a knock at the door startled her. She huffed indignantly and pushed herself wearily from her chair. 

                "I can't possibly be catching hell for leaving that lame Halloween feast early," she asked herself as she opened the door. 

                To her surprise, it was Professor Lupin that was at the other end. 

                "Indira…I mean, Professor Sinistra," he corrected quickly. She'd had the same problem all year. She always called him by his first name. It was odd trying to be professional when it was your old schoolmates you were working with now. It had taken her a whole year to get over the fact that Severus was the Potions Master when she'd first taken the Astronomy position. She was still convinced that he hated her. But that was a story for another day. 

                "Can I help you, Remus?" she added, smiling as her visitor fidgeted and seemed to struggle with some inward conflict. "Is anything the matter?" she asked, her smile fading into concern. 

                "It's Sirius Black," he announced, causing her to wince slightly. Since when had one of his dearest friends begun to refer to him as a solicitor might refer to a prospective client. It was so sterile and lacked the emotion that she knew was there for him. At least she cared for him, even if his friends had deserted him. "He's been here. In the school. He's slashed the portrait of the Fat Lady," he added urgently. 

                Her heart leapt. Why would he have done something so awful? She'd never believed for one second that he was after James Potter's child. But now, this new turn of events seemed rather incriminating. 

                "Oh dear!" was her breathless reply. 

                "The staff is meeting downstairs to conduct a search of the castle and grounds. I'm to round you up. We're expected immediately."

                "Right," the small, Middle Eastern woman said, slipping her robe on over her jeans and slipping on some shoes. 

                "Are the children all right?" she asked after a moment's thought. 

                "Everyone is fine. The students have been herded into the Great Hall. They will stay there for the remainder of the evening as I understand it," Remus answered stoically. 

                She wanted to ask him if he believed any of this conspiracy, but the answer seemed obvious. 

                The staff room was full of anxious teachers, all arguing the guilt or innocence of the man they were to hunt. Severus seemed the most adamant above all of them. 

She rolled her eyes. Typical. 

"And Remus, Indira. You'll take the third floor," the Deputy Headmistress announced as they came in. She caught the less than enthusiastic glare Severus shot at the both of them. 

"Are you sure that's wise, Minerva?" he implored. "You are aware of their history."

Professor McGonagal held up a hand to stop all conversation. "We're wasting precious time debating. Everyone split up and search your designated areas. I want any news immediately. Don't try to go after him yourself. As he has displayed clearly tonight, Sirius Black is armed and without a doubt dangerous."

"Dangerous my ass!" Indira wished to shout. They were all eager to see him hang. She knew there was more to it that that. He couldn't be guilty of what he was accused of. She held her tongue as she had always been taught and followed Remus out the door and up two flights of stairs. 

"It might be more efficient to take a half each. Are you sure you are all right—," Remus began to suggest. 

Indira wheeled around to face him, wand raised. "Don't finish that sentence. Of course I'll be fine on my own."

"Indira I, I know what you're thinking," Remus held up his hands in a sign of truce, "I know it's hard for you to accept. But he was their secret keeper. He betrayed them. I didn't want to believe it any more than you want to," he paused, "But there you have it."

"God. You have no faith in your friends," she accused and walked off down the hall shaking her head and leaving Remus looking after her. 

She prayed that she got to him first before the others—the vigilantes—got to him. 

***

Walking the dark corridors, Indira amused herself by remembering the four unstoppable Gryffindor Marauders and one dark-haired mischief maker in general. 

She couldn't remember one moment of her school days that were spent in any other fashion than mooning over Sirius. 

There was her twelfth birthday when James paid Sirius to kiss her, Lily's awkward and introverted friend. She knew she was being set up for a horrible joke, but it didn't much matter. Despite her olive complexion, Indira was afraid she'd blushed when he pecked her cheek. Of course, the magic of the moment soon wore off as she'd realized that it was a means of distraction. He'd put a spider in her long, dark lengths of hair. 

She shrugged. It was romantic for about a half a second anyway. 

_"Friday night I crashed your party _

_Saturday I said I'm sorry_

_Sunday came and trashed me out again…"_

She smiled. She had remembered when the poor dear had gotten so smashed at Lily and James' engagement party and spent the rest of the evening belting out Billy Joel songs with James and Peter. She could explain the fact that Peter and Sirius knew any muggle songs, but how James knew was anybody's guess. He was a pureblood from what she knew of him. 

_"I was only having fun_

_Wasn't hurting any one_

_and we all enjoyed the weekend for a change …"_

Before vomiting all over her new, flattering dress that she'd bought specifically so he would notice her, he had finally come around to asking her out to dinner. 

As she looked down at the mess of imported silk and about half the contents of the mini-bar that was now dripping into her shoes, she wondered for the briefest of seconds what the hell had compelled her to accept.  That was simple, she could answer now: he was dead sexy even when regurgitating all over her with his friends cheering him on in the background. 

_"I've been stranded in the combat zone_

_I walked though Bedford Stuy alone…"_

Their first date had left a lot to be desired. She had, like any sane woman, accepted his apology for never noticing her before, for the spider, for the dress, for the fact that he'd written a love letter to Snape and signed her name to it, along with a dozen other horrid things she'd never even known he'd perpetrated against her. But the entire conversation revolved around the bloody Kenmare Kestrels. 

She hated Quidditch. 

He never once asked her how her project on Mars' revelations about Dark Activity was coming. She had politely listened to one play-by-play after another. 

The kiss goodnight might not have even happened had she not made the impatient first move. There was one good thing to be said about him. No, that was unfair. There was a multitude of wonderful things about him. If she could keep his mind off of his sport for long enough. 

He flung his surprise out the window and kissed her back. 

And then it rained. 

"Want to have some fun?" he asked her, with a dashing raise of his perfect eyebrows. 

_"Even rode my motorcycle in the rain_

_And you told me not to drive_

_But I made it home alive_

_So you said that only proves that I'm insane…"_

She gasped at his shocking question. Did she look like the sort of girl that would say "yes, please?" Or was she the type to slap that suggestive look off of his face? 

The latter, she decided. 

She raised a hand to deal him a reprimanding blow across the face. But, he blocked her swing masterfully, grabbing her wrist just inches from his face. Damn his flawless Quidditch reflexes, she thought. 

"Calm down. It wasn't the offer of a wild passionate romp that you so desperately thought it was. Though you could probably use one," she remembered him saying. He pointed to his motorcycle, gleaming in the streetlight. 

"I don't think so," she said, attempting to remove her hand from his. He closed his fingers tight around her hand and half drug her out into the street where the rain began to soak her through. 

"You're crazy! It's raining," she shouted, terrified. He was really going to do it. 

"It's perfectly safe. Come on. You don't look like you have enough fun," he said. His dark eyes glinted appealingly. He looked irresistible, his dark locks dripping in the rain. 

"I don't have any fun, thank you," she admitted. 

He mounted the bike and held out a hand to her, "That's only because you haven't found the right guy." He winked at her. 

She would still swear that her knees were proverbially weak for days after he'd done that. 

Without a second thought she hopped on behind him, tightening her grip to crushing-ribs strength as he tore off down her quiet street. "Jesus! You're trying to kill me!" she shouted in his ear. 

He leaned back and smiled. "I'm only trying to loosen you up, love," he countered.

_"You may be right_

_I may be crazy_

_But it just might be a lunatic you're looking for_

_Turn out the light_

_Don't try to save me_

_You may be wrong for all I know you may be right_

_Remember how I found you there alone in your electric chair_

_I told you dirty jokes until you smiled…"_

"They rejected my research," she told him, flopping down on the couch, her face puffy from crying. "All of my work, down the drain. They laughed at it. They called me young and naïve. I know more about the stars than all of them put together," she shouted indignantly, spiraling into a new fit of tears. 

"They're idiots," Sirius said simply, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her on the cheek. "Completely outdated, crusty old men who felt challenged by the bright ideas of an intelligent and truly amazing woman," Sirius added. 

"You're just saying that," she sniffed. 

"I'm just saying it," Sirius continued, "because it's true. You'll be running that Department one day and you'll totally revolutionize things."

She turned and smiled up at him. She knew how comical she must look. Her face must resemble a punching bag at the moment. But the way he looked at her, she felt as though she were the most stunning creature he'd ever seen. 

"You're still my favorite star," she admitted as he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. 

_"You were lonely for a man _

_I said take me as I am_

_Cause you might enjoy some madness for a while_

_Now think of all the years you tried to find someone to satisfy you_

_I might be as crazy as you say_

_If I'm crazy than it's true that it's all because of you_

_And you wouldn't want me any other way…"_

"What is it?" Indira asked tentatively, taking Sirius' cloak from him. She didn't expect him to show up at her door tonight. It had become increasingly dangerous for them to be seen together. 

He passed a weary had across his eyes, "James has asked me to be the secret keeper. He's taking Lily and Harry. They're going into hiding," he admitted reluctantly. 

Indira sat next to him on the sofa and took his hand. She tried to calm their shaking, but she knew he had noticed her fear. "Oh God! Is it really as bad as all that?" she asked, astonished. She knew they were being specifically targeted, but she hadn't realized how close the situation had come. They were hiding now. Voldemort must be closing in. She immediately thought of Lily. She sympathized with how worried a mother might be for her child. Harry was only a little over a year old. James must have been frantic to keep them safe. The Fidelius Charm was desperate. But it was foolproof if you had someone trustworthy to keep your secret—that almost never was the case. 

"And? What did you say, love?" she prompted, laying her head on his shoulder. She knew how big of a burden this would be for him. That was practically his only family. He loved Harry as if it were his own child. 

"Of course, I agreed, Indira," he snapped. She let it pass. She knew how worried he was right now. She couldn't blame him for being edgy. "But," he continued reluctantly, "I'm not sure I'm the best choice for the task."

"Sure you are. You wouldn't give them up for anything. You would die first," she said rubbing his arm comfortingly. 

"I would. But, I'm also the obvious choice. I couldn't take any risks with them. They're my family. If they were to…"

"Don't say that," Indira begged. 

He pushed her away from him, getting to his feet and wildly pacing the floor in front of the fire. 

"I have to get someone else," he said wildly. 

"Who?" Indira asked. He was rambling and frantic. The more he paced, the more determined he became. 

"I couldn't tell you that. They would come after you," he stopped to look out the window and then turned to face her again, "I'm probably endangering you this very minute."

He raced into the entryway. Indira was becoming frantic at his troubling behavior. She'd never seen him like this before. 

He grabbed his cloak and spun around just as she'd entered the room. He took her in his arms and kissed her. It felt like goodbye. 

He Apparated in the hall, leaving her to stare disbelieving at the spot  he'd just occupied. 

He was gone. 

The next time she'd heard anything about the love of her life, he'd supposedly betrayed Lily and James, Harry had only survived by some miracle and Peter had been killed along with twelve innocent bystanders. Sirius was reportedly guilty of all of this. But Indira knew instantly it wasn't true. None of it. 

And now he was out of Azkaban and, like the past twelve excruciating years, everyone was still desperate to convince her of his crimes. The only one she suspected him of was being at the wrong place at the wrong time. 

_"You may be right_

_I may be crazy_

_But it just might be a lunatic you're looking for_

_It's too late to fight_

_It's too late to change me_

_You may be wrong for all I know_

_But you may be right…"_

Indira shook her head. It wasn't practical to live in the past. She had to find him now to save him. Her feelings didn't matter any more. He could have forgotten her by now, he could have changed his mind about her, he could hate her…

Here reservations were halted as she was glued to the spot. 

A drastically altered Sirius was standing in the hallway ahead of her, staring at her. 

Her heart beat faster as she prayed she wasn't hallucinating. 

"Indira," he croaked. 

She stayed rooted to the spot. His voice was different. He looked fifty pounds lighter at least. He didn't look healthy. His hair was longer and matted. 

She took a step forward. He stepped back. 

She wanted to cry out, to throw her arms around him. He looked so hurt and sick. She couldn't stand to see him like this. Apparently he couldn't stand for her to see him in this state either. 

"Go ahead, call for them. Send me back to prison," he spat. 

"I wouldn't do that, Sirius," Indira protested. She gasped as she heard Remus' footfalls. He was coming to find her. 

She pushed Sirius into the nearest room. 

She lingered a little longer in his arms than necessary and his hands went to her waist, pushing her away. 

"Don't you think I'm guilty too? He does," Sirius asked, jerking his head in Remus' approaching direction. 

"No, I don't believe it Sirius." She searched his eyes for some sign of the man she loved. It was there, just behind the wall that was there. She could break it down, she knew she could. She was determined to have him back. But first she needed to get him out of here. 

"You have to get out of here," she whispered. 

Sirius seemed to hesitate for a moment and then pulled her into a passionate embrace. He kissed her—a kiss that told her, in time he would come back to her. 

"I love you, Indira," he said, reluctantly pulling away from her, "I'll come back to you if I can."

She shook her head, tears filling her eyes. 

She handed him her wand that he put to the statue in that room, muttering, "Dissendium!"

He stepped through and into the tunnel that the statue concealed. 

He finally let go of her hand and turned to leave. 

"Sirius!" she whispered after a pause. "You're still my favorite star!"

He blew her a kiss and disappeared. 

She replaced her wand after concealing the entrance again. 

"What are you doing in here?" Remus asked, startling her a bit, "I've already checked this room."

She shrugged and wiped a tear from her cheek. 

Remus placed a comforting arm around her shoulders and whispered a heartfelt, "I'm sorry, Indira."

"I'll be okay," she admitted. 


End file.
